I am getting punished. Do I back down? Or do I push ahead? Time to put my strategy hat on.

Hey Stranger,

Let's act out a common work situation together.

You are in a group chat at work.

In this group chat, there is a staff, manager and partner.

The partner starts degrading the staff right there in the chat.

You are the manager.

What would you do here?

• Message the partner privately to explain why their behavior is not acceptable

• Check in on the staff to see if they are okay

• Do nothing since you are convinced nothing will change

• Report it to HR

It's tough. I know.

Unfortunately, many choose to do nothing.

Mainly due to fears of losing their jobs, damaging professional relationships, or facing backlash.

This fear often silences those who otherwise want to do the right thing.

I get it.

I was like that too.

So what changed?

Over time, my personal values became clearer, and my silence became unbearable.

The fear of "punishment" for speaking out became less daunting.

I started to speak up, first cautiously, then more confidently.

And yes, speaking up hasn't always led to happy endings.

Sometimes, it has complicated my professional life, adding "stories" that were tough to navigate.

But it also led to positive changes that wouldn't have happened otherwise.

So why speak up?

• Your voice matters. If you are scared to speak to them directly, find ways to raise your concerns - perhaps through a trusted colleague or mentor.

• Understand and keep to your values. They are your north star when things get hard.

• Consider the broader impact. The cost of silence extends beyond this one instance.

I don't need you to be a hero.

I need you to figure out your values.

And do not compromise them for fear.

You can make a difference.

And you can stand out 100x faster.

The future is empathy.

Demand a culture of respect and integrity.

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Your brave soldier,

Mary F